In this issue of our newsletter, we decided to post an actual letter from one of our readers. He is the parent of a child with autism. Since autism is such a prevalent disorder that affects so many lives, we thought that it would be extremely helpful for some families to know that they are not alone. We hope that you enjoy the article and that you feel as moved by this family’s story as we were.
Autism- A Parent's Perspective
Dealing with an autistic child is extremely challenging. As they get older, you begin seeing your child struggle with speech impairment, motility deficiencies, and/or extreme behavioral/social issues. It’s painful to see as a parent because you want to “fix it” but you feel helpless. At times, when you reach your breaking point of frustration, you wonder why this child was given to you and why you just can’t have a “normal” family.. Don’t beat yourself up over those thoughts. If you’re the parent of an autistic child, you have had these thoughts more than once.. That’s normal. The important thing is that you love the child through it all and that you have some type of outlet, be it a spouse, friend, or family member you can lean on for support.
The key to effectively raising and treating an autistic child really starts with you. Yes, early intervention is the first step to determining the proper course of treatment for your child. But first, you have to “get right” with the situation. For my wife and I, the first step was awareness. When my son was a baby, he wouldn’t put anything in his mouth like normal babies do. Once he finally did put something in his mouth, he wouldn’t chew it. He would just swish food around in his mouth and swallow. This was our first clue that our son had a sensory issue. Kids (or adults for that matter) can have sensory issues to food, clothing, light, or a myriad of other things. Another symptom we discovered was that he liked to spin in circles, flap his hands in his peripheral line of vision, and get hooked on watching flashes of light. We later learned that this was called “stemming”. Essentially, these behaviors gave him sort of a high. While these symptoms are not necessarily
a tell-tale sign of autism, they are absolutely red flags. So, we became acutely aware of this sensory issue and recognized that this was not normal.
This leads to the second step, which is acceptance. This is hard! No one wants to believe their child is “special needs” or any other label that means abnormal. This kind of thing only happens to other people, right? Wrong! 1 in 88 children have autism today. The disorder has become more and more common, not because more and more children have autism now, but because there is much more awareness than ever before. People are more educated on recognizing signs and symptoms and much more willing to find out what’s wrong with their child. Acceptance that there is something wrong is paramount! You can’t treat something until you accept that there is something to treat.
We took our son to Early Steps, which is a center that has speech and occupational therapy for toddlers with sensory issues and other symptoms indicative of autism. We started taking him there at the age of 9 months. He was formally diagnosed when he was 2 years old and that’s when the true realization of this whole “special needs” thing hit. This is where our “acceptance” was put to the test. We had a choice to commit to a pretty rigid and intense course of treatment and various testing, or we could deny the diagnosis and get a second opinion. We decided to accept the diagnosis and committed ourselves to getting our son the best treatment available to maximize his chances of being independent and happy when he gets older. We are so happy we did!
It is absolutely a struggle at times. He not only goes to speech, occupational, and behavioral therapy, but we have also converted half of our house into therapy rooms to deal with his sensory issues. The bottom line is that we would go the end of the earth to make sure that our son is happy and healthy.
Our son is going to be 4 this August and he has made tremendous progress. Had we not paid attention to the signs and symptoms early on and accepted the fact that he needed treatment, who knows what he would be like today. It’s critical to your child’s future that you get involved as early as possible and research all treatment options available in your area. It’s a long road, but it’s worth every ounce of struggle to see the amazing effects of your involvement come to fruition in your child.
Submitted by: Dan Goldberg
*If any parents or family members of autistic children would like to share your experiences, please feel free to comment below.
